ODDITORIUM

three days before i started hitting the keys of this mac,i had a daydreaming, where life was simplier than it used to be. a flashback, an experience we wish to go back. a wish that answers what is the meaning of everything. the “how to play with a tabo when i used to be a kid.”

it’s not normal to see a young man/woman taking a bath (with clothes) along the streets. but in manila, everything is possible. i guess even in the province, probably we still do have some of those, even grown-ups like mamay or lolas love to be seen wet and wild. my jeepney ride going home passes by a squatter’s area, where we all know, the scarcity of proper bathroom is inexcusable.

remember how puny your head used to be? how the tabo fits enough while water purs down on your face and refracted colors of the sunlight spreads on your eyesight? the usage of a tabo (dipper for elitist’s sake) only exist on my apartment whenever i need to poop or to take a bath during chilly mornings.

back when i was young, i look forward to every bathtime i take everyday. it was like you can’t always go to the beach, but you have a whole ocean when your planggana/palanggana was all full of water. the fun of pumping the “poso” and imagine how many bubbles you can make, the water gun and how i used to water those unnamed plants which doesnt get wet (never knew it was an important ingredients for a special bikol delicacy.) gah! how i miss running around with my undies. haha.

i seldom seek why the hell am i doing here. questioning like a little kid was not a righteous way. i keep on working and working, leaving me oblivious.

am i fulfilling a messianic stupidity?
(heavenly sound background)

i do not know.

the subject of blabbing here only keeps me locked in a labyrinth full of lions. okay am being bitter again. wish i was jobless again.

maybe not.

i still take a bath everyday(of course) in a shower, naked, obliged to go to my workplace and do stuff which i seldom doubt if i am still enjoying it. i get paid though but i don’t give a damn now. i take a bath to be cleanse, wishing i am neat and be able to sell another day in my years of existence. i wonder, was it not wasted?

the kid who loves to play tabo never knew he have grown already. he is a wage earner and a struggling independent yuppie, lost in a concocted place where cityslickers and fate-gamblers mingle.

i wonder when will he can reclaim his youth.

how i wish as soon as death is not yet near. baah!

i need a vacation.